Left Out

Sorry, this post again my rambling about my so called ‘beautiful and interesting’ infertility life. At this point of time, i am so down. Chatted with a good friend of mine, who happen to be male, who told me, ‘my wife is pregnant’ 3 months. I seriously don't know how to react. Thankfully the conversation was through online, so he could not see my face reaction.

In my circle of friends, every one has moved on to the next stage of their life. Me, being among those who married early in that group, still stuck in the middle of no where. I feel left out totally. I don't know how to react to them when i meet them in person. Although i always ended up so caring asking about how their pregnancy going on, I'm not sure is my face looked normal or not.

They have the common things to talk about, pregnancies, babies. nursery and schools. I am left out, although i always join in the conversation, specially in the office when all the other ladies are either pregnant or already have babies, its not from my own experience. All from my observations which cant be real experiences!

My mind started to see who else in my circle of friends/relative who’s still childless and yeah… there is one friend of mine who got married 2 months early b4 me. Called her and talked to her for a while. She seems very strong and confident. I wish I can be like her…

On the other note, another male friend of me asked hows life going. I answered ‘so so’ and this is what i got reply from him.

life is quite unpredictable, but telling the truth i always admire u. u are a brave girl!

Didnt expect that answer from him at all!

Receive 2 positive energy from 2 different people today. Hope it helps to divert my mind :)